Life & Career Coaching for Lawyers
Life & Career Coaching for Lawyers
One of the most common recurring themes I encounter when working with new clients is the question: is it me or is it the job? Today I want to explore a simple exploration you can undertake to get to the bottom of this critical and terrifying question.
Nearly every client I work with has a hard time disconnecting from work. Why is disconnection so hard?
Most of the attorneys that I work with do not believe that it is possible for them to create happiness within their current environment. They come to me unhappy and overworked. They believe that the only way things are going to get better is if the firm finally changes. Or if they leave. Part of the work that I do with my clients is helping them to start setting boundaries and flexing their “no” muscle. Today we explore why this so hard and why we MUST change.
What if being human and being the best version of ourselves simply meant that sometimes we wonder if we’re doing it right?
Just because our logic-reasoning skills have improved and we know that it’s not prudent to lie about things that are likely memorialized on camera, it doesn’t mean we have gotten any better at accepting the results of our actions. Most of us have just gotten really good at dressing our blame up in prettier clothing: victim clothing.
When our steps forward are harder than they should be and we find ourselves just forcing every action, we have to ask ourselves what is going on behind the scenes? Is there an opportunity to make peace and release some dead weight?
One of the struggles with being a lawyer, coaching lawyers is that I get it. I can 1,000% relate to the struggles and challenges female attorneys face. I know the pains of receiving emergent emails as you’re about to walk out the door to a funeral, the helpless fatigue and mild depression that sets in on your 10th straight day of working 14-hour days. How do we handle the demands of law?
Many of my clients struggle with being wrong because of what they make that mean about themselves. If they are wrong, it must mean they are not good enough, they aren’t cut out to be lawyers. But what if defensiveness had so much more to teach us?
Practicing law is difficult and sometimes you will have to reorganize your carefully laid plans or have some challenging discussions about competing priorities. It happens. Success is about learning to honor yourself and your abilities and not expecting yourself to tackle every single thing that comes your way. There are limits to your ability to handle it all. Getting organized is the first step to recognizing those limits.
When someone says to you: “Tell me about yourself.” How do you respond?
Most of us take this to mean the trifecta: What do you do? Are you married? Do you have kids?
The interesting thing about how we respond to these lines of questioning is that our responses almost invariably describe our pasts.
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